Discovering Defaults

The default position for many people is “no.”
You might be able to guilt, pressure, persuade, demand or argue people into a one-time yes. But that’s not how a relationship is formed, and it’s not sustainable over the long term. (The only way to sustain it long term is by force, through enforceable regulation.)
To change a person’s default, we must help people, let people discover “yes” for themselves.
This takes is less industrial and more organic: planting seeds, caring for the new plants, giving the idea the time it needs to grow up. Change takes time.
How much of church ministry (conversion=default change) is argument based, and how much is seed planting and discovery based?